let me just expose myself to the world.

Not only does she feel the need to wear an unnecessarily small bikini top, but we do not need to see your ass in the air. There are so many more dainty ways to bend over. Thanks to Chelsea for the pics!

people, once again, please control your children.

This is what happens when parents don't pay attention to their children. Next we'll see her on Girls Gone Wild. Thanks to Hannah for the pic!

i just have the perfect body for this.

Really? Please? Stop? If I ask nicely, will you buy a bigger bathing suit? One that preferably covers your entire ass/legs/body? Thanks so much.

this one bit of exercise will totally help with my figure.

I would definitely prefer if you didn't move that much, with so much vigor and enthusiasm. I mean, props to you for working out and trying to get in shape and what not, but I mean, is it that hard to put a shirt on? We really don't want to watch sand be shaken out of your fat rolls. Thanks so much to Atsirk for the pic! :)

i'm going to wear my clothes in the water, thanks for asking.

Why. I just don't understand why you would go to a BEACH and wear your street clothes into the water. I mean, is it that hard to put on a pair of board shorts or something? Or do you just not own any..?

control your children please.

This is what happens when you let your children run rampant. Their pants fall down and they don't even know that they're practically mooning the entire population of York County. If you have to get one of those child leashes, do it, but we really don't want to see pale, white, ass cheek.

one pieces are made for a reason.

And this woman would be the exact reason why. Honestly, this is not attractive in any sense of the word. I had to watch her attempt to fix that stupid umbrella so many times I thought I would puke. Please, please invest in a one piece bathing suit.

oh wait, i know him...

This here, would be Matt DeLong. What first caught our eye, was his Wonder Bread-esque mini shorts. Then we realized we knew him, and got him to pose for a few pictures. Multiple girls hit on him while this photo shoot was occurring.

i would appreciate it if you didn't do that.

Okay, I understand your thighs are white and you want some color, but do that somewhere else. Number one: you just look weird, and number two: I'm now blind. Thanks for that. And thanks to Ashley for the pic!

please. for the sake of my eyes, put some clothes on.

Bathing suits should not be made in those sizes. For everyone's sake.